Today’s topic revolves around goal setting and how you choose goals. How do you know they’re right for you and how do you make sure you stay on track and achieve those goals.
If you are a multi-passionate just like yours truly then you might know by now what does NOT work for. Which is following the same “old” advice that goes “just stick to 1 thing only, pick 1 thing and get super good at it”. Yeah, right! It might work for these “linear” people who see things in terms of black and white. But when there’s more than 50 shades of grey when it comes to what your interests & passions are – pun intended – that approach will fail you 100%.
When you have many interests which you are pursuing at the same time it’s easy to get scattered and feel you are not getting much done.
What I have discovered to be of help is working with “process goals”. Instead of setting 3 different goals with little impact & growth / added value such as: loose 5 pounds, learn German, cook dinner at home at least 3 times/ week, etc. Go instead for 1 BIG process goal such as “run Boston marathon 12 months from today” and see what happens. Since running a marathon is such a big & complex goal which involves you getting transformed into this whole new person which you’re not at the moment (which is a marathoner!) you’ll have no choice other than to cook dinner at home 3 times/ week (or at least have something ready for when you come back from your runs), you’ll lose more than 5 pounds for sure, you can listen to an audiobook in German while you’re at it running around the park and you’ll feel just awesome since exercise gives you so much endorphins. Makes sense?!
You can apply the same process to pretty much any other type of goal such as “get a promotion at work “(super vague, generic, nothing in there to help you grow). Try instead turning this into a process goal. Ask yourself “who is 1 person I look up to at work? What are they’re top 3 qualities that I would like to get some of that? How can I use these 3 qualities into my own work?!”. This brings so much openness and opportunities for growth so much more than a bland “I want a promotion”. After answering these q’s you can work the details on your own (get specific with what you want to have in your job).
A friend of mine asked me recently “how do you know if a goal is right for you?”. Or where/ how do you set these goals? Do they come from your mind? (like after doing a brainstorming session). Do they come as a result of talking to someone you trust? Are you setting a certain goal just because this is popular among your friends?!
I’m sure you have noticed by now that whenever you set a goal because you think “this is the right for me to do” or “I should be doing this by now” or “all my friends are getting married/ having babies/ working up the corporate ladder, etc.” that particular goal never seems to come to life. It gets moved from your to-do list to the next month and then the next Monday and soon enough the year is over and you realized that it’s the2nd or 3rd time that nasty goal keeps jumping from page to page in your daily planner.
When it comes to yourself there is only 1 expert who knows what’s best for you. And that expert my dear it’s YOU. Of course others can/ will help but when it comes to making the decisions it’s you and you alone. So don’t try to “blame” it on your family, or friends or mentors or partners. They surely want you to succeed and be happy. But most of the times their vision of happiness is worlds’ apart from what you own vision looks like. They will advise you by saying what THEY think it’s best for you. So what can you do then?
Well there’s a beautiful quote from Rumi saying “there’s a voice that doesn’t use words. Listen.” You can sit and do exactly that. Just that. Listen to yourself. How you do that?! Well one of the easiest ways is to “sweat it out” put on your sneakers and go for walk or do some sports, anything that will get you heart pumping for at least 30-45 mins. Then come back, take a shower, change, relax and get some stretching. Ask yourself “what do I really want? What would I do if I was not afraid?!”. And listen.
As simple as that.
P.S. If you enjoyed reading this and you have a friend who is also a multi-passionate please share it with them! And hop on over to Facebook in The Pineapple Diaries and join in the conversation with other multi-passsionates just like you!
Drop me a line in the comments below and let me know what would you like to get done by the end of this year (that’s 362 days from today, yay!).